Radical, Queer, Brown Boy

A Guanaco's Personal Blog on Race, Class, Gender, Liberation, Culture, Art & Queerness.

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  1. afroblamerican:

    cum-fraiche:

    thetpr:

    blackaudacity:

    RASHIDA: I wouldn’t trade my family for anything. My mother shocked her Jewish parents by marrying out of her religion and race. And my father: growing up poor and black, buckling the odds and becoming so successful, having the attitude of “I love this woman! We’re going to have babies and to hell with anyone who doesn’t like it!”

    KIDADA: We had a sweet, encapsulated family. We were our own little world. But there’s the warmth of love inside a family, and then there’s the outside world. When I was born in 1974, there were almost no other biracial families–or black families–in our neighborhood. I was brown-skinned with short, curly hair. Mommy would take me out in my stroller and people would say, “What a beautiful baby…whose is it?” Rashida came along in 1976. She had straight hair and lighter skin. My eyes were brown; hers were green. IN preschool, our mother enrolled us in the Buckley School, an exclusive private school. It was almost all white.

    RASHIDA: In reaction to all that differentess, Kidada tried hard to define herself as a unique person by becoming a real tomboy.

    KIDADA: While Rashida wore girly dresses, I loved my Mr. T dolls and my Jaws T-shirt. But seeing the straight hair like the other girls had, like my sister had…I felt: “It’s not fair! I want that hair!”

    PEGGY: I was the besotted mother of two beautiful daughters I’d had with the man I loved–I saw Kidada through those eyes. I thought she had the most gorgeous hair–those curly, curly ringlets. I still think so!

    KIDADA: One day a little blond classmate just out and called me “Chocolate bar.” I shot back: “Vanilla!”

    QUINCY: I felt deeply for Kidada; I thought racism would be over by the eighties. My role was to put things in perspective for her, project optimism, imply that things were better than they’d been for me growing up on the south side of Chicago in the 1930s.

    KIDADA: I had another hurdle as a kid: I was dyslexic. I was held back in second grade. I flunked algebra three times. The hair, the skin, the frustration with schoolwork: It was all part of the shake. I was a strong-willed, quirky child–mischievous.

    RASHIDA: Kidada was cool. I was a dork. I had a serious case of worship for my big sister. She was so strong, so popular, so rebellious. Here’s the difference in our charisma: When I was 8 and Kidada was 10, we tried to get invited into the audience of our favorite TV shows. Mine was Not Necessarily the News, a mock news show, and hers was Punky Brewster, about a spunky orphan. I went by the book, writing a fan letter–and I got back a form letter. Kidada called the show, used her charm, wouldn’t take no for an answer. Within a week she was invited to the set!

    KIDADA: I was kicked out of Buckley in second grade for behavior problems. I didn’t want my mother to come to my new school. If kids saw her, it would be: “your mom’s white!” I told Mom she couldn’t pick me up; she had to wait down the street in her car. Did Rashida have that problem? No! She passed for white.

    RASHIDA: “Passed”?! I had no control over how I looked. This is my natural hair, these are my natural eyes! I’ve never tried to be anything that I’m not. Today I feel guilty, knowing that because of the way our genes tumbled out, Kidada had to go through pain I didn’t have to endure. Loving her so much, I’m sad that I’ll never share that experience with her.

    KIDADA: Let me make this clear: My feelings about my looks were never “in comparison to” Rashida. It was the white girls in class that I compared myself to. Racial issues didn’t exist at home. Our parents weren’t black and white; they were Mommy and Daddy.

    RASHIDA: But it was different with our grandparents. Our dad’s father died before we were born. We didn’t see our dad’s mother often. I felt comfortable with Mommy’s parents, who’d come to love my dad like a son. Kidada wasn’t so comfortable with them. I felt Jewish; Kidada didn’t.

    KIDADA: I knew Mommy’s parents were upset at first when she married a black man, and though they did the best they could, I picked up on what I thought was their subtle disapproval of me. Mommy says they loved me, but I felt estranged from them.

    While Rashida stayed and excelled at Buckley, Kidada bumped from school to school; she got expelled from 10 in all because of behavior problems, which turned out to be related to her dyslexia.

    KIDADA: We had a nanny, Anna, from El Salvador. I couldn’t get away with stuff with her. Mommy knew Anna could give her the backup she needed in the discipline department because she was my color. Anna was my “ethnic mama.”

    PEGGY: Kidada never wanted to be white. She spoke with a little…twist in her language. She had ‘tude. Rashida spoke more primly, and her identity touched all bases. She’d announce, “I’m going to be the first female, black, Jewish president of the U.S.!”

    KIDADA: When I was 11, a white girlfriend and I were going to meet up with these boys she knew. I’d told her, because I wanted to be accepted, “Tell them I’m tan.” When we met them, the one she was setting me up with said, “You didn’t tell me she was black.” That’s When I started defining myself as black, period. Why fight it? Everyone wanted to put me in a box. On passports, at doctor’s offices, when I changed schools, there were boxes to check: Caucasian, Black, Hispanic, Asian. I don’t mean any dishonor to my mother–who is the most wonderful mother in the world, and we are so alike–but: I am black. Rashida answers questions about “what” she is differently. She uses all the adjectives: black, white, Jewish.

    RASHIDA: Yes, I do. And I get: “But you look so white!” “You’re not black!” I want to say: “Do you know how hurtful that is to somebody who identifies so strongly with half of who she is?” Still, that’s not as bad as when people don’t know. A year ago a taxi driver said to me, That Jennifer Lopez is a beautiful woman. Thank God she left that disgusting black man, Puffy.” I said, “I’m black.” He tried to smooth it over. IF you’re obviously black, white people watch their tongues, but with me they think they can say anything. When people don’t know “what” you are, you get your heart broken daily.

    KIDADA: Rashida has it harder than I do: She can feel rejection from both parties.

    RASHIDA: When I audition for white roles, I’m told I’m “too exotic.” When I go up for black roles, I’m told I’m “too light.” I’ve lost a lot of jobs, looking the way I do.

    PEGGY: As Kidada grew older, it became clear that she wouldn’t be comfortable unless she was around kids who looked more like her. So I searched for a private school that had a good proportion of black students, and when she was 12, I found one.

    KIDADA: That changed everything. I’d go to my black girlfriends’ houses and–I wanted their life! I lived in a gated house in a gated neighborhood, where playdates were: “My security will call your security.” Going to my black friends’ houses, I saw a world that was warm and real, where families sat down for dinner together. At our house, Rashida and I often ate dinner on trays, watching TV in Anna’s room, because our dada was composing and performing at night and Mom sat in on his sessions.

    RASHIDA: But any family, from any background, can have that coziness too.

    KIDADA: I’m sure that’s true, but I experienced all that heart and soul in black families. I started putting pressure on Mommy to let me go to a mostly black public school. I was on her and on her and on her. I wouldn’t let up until she said yes.

    PEGGY: So one day when Kidada was 14, we drove to Fairfax High, where I gave a fake address and enrolled her.

    KIDADA: All those kids! A deejay in the quad at lunch! Bus passes! All those cute black boys; no offense, but I thought white boys were boring. I fit in right away; the kids had my outgoing vibe. My skin and hair had been inconveniences at my other schools–I could never get those Madonna spiked bangs that all the white girls were wearing–but my girlfriends at Fairfax thought my skin was beautiful, and they loved to put their hands in my hair and braid it. The kids knew who my dad was an my stock went up. I felt secure. I was home.

    RASHIDA: Our parents divorced when I was 10; Kidada went to live with Dad in his new house in Bel Air, and I moved with Mom to a house in Brentwood. Mom was very depressed after the divorce, and I made it my business to keep her company.

    KIDADA: I wanted to live with Dad not because he was the black parent, but because he traveled. I could get away with more.

    RASHIDA: At this time, anyone looking at Kidada and me would have seen two very different girls. I wore my navy blue jumper and crisp white blouse; K wore baggy Adidas sweatsuits and door-knocker earrings. My life was school, school, school. I’m with Bill Cosby: It’s every bit as black as it is white to be a nerd with a book in your hand.

    KIDADA: The fact that Rashida was good at school while I was dyslexic intimidated me and pushed me more into my defiant role. I was ditching classes and going to clubs.

    RASHIDA: About this time, Kidada was replacing me with younger girls from Fairfax who she could lead and be friends with.

    KIDADA: They were my little sisters, as far as I was concerned.

    RASHIDA: When I’d go to our dad’s house on weekends, eager to see Kidada, the new “little sisters” would be there. She’d be dressing them up like dolls. It hurt! I was jealous!

    KIDADA: You felt that? I always thought you’d rejected me.

    RASHIDA: Still, our love for the same music–Prince, Bobby Brown, Bell Biv DeVoe–would bring us together on weekends.

    Lml me and my pops were speculating throughout the whole movie of “I Love You Man” like “Dawg, I think she’s a sister. Man she gotta be mixed. She gotta be. She just passing that’s all.. Man she has to be..” 

    This actually drastically changes how I feel about Rashida. 

    Wow, yeah, me too. This is…wow…deep.

     
     
  2. $533 Seeking Roommate for a Queer People of Color Household- $533 (Bushwick, Brooklyn)

    Sadly, our roommate and close friend is moving out of our three bedroom apartment in Bushwick into Manhattan to be closer to work (that bitch). So, we are seeking to fill his spot within our queer people of color house hold. The move in date is February 1st, 2013, but woud like a commitment by the middle of January.  This is for a one year lease.  Personal message me if interested or feel free to forward this ad.  Contact email: devyndarko@gmail.com


    You want in?

    Ok. 

    About the perspective roommate: Clean, respectful, responsible, relatively social, politically left minded; queers, women, and people of color to the front of the line. You must be employed and able to pay rent ($533/month) on time.

    About the roommates, Roommate One: 1st generation Salvadoran American, involved in activism, enjoys cooking, films, museums, and music. Clean and social. Roommate Two: West-Indian, 1st generation American. Friendly enough. Clean and relatively quiet. 

    About the room: 8 feet by 10 feet, (and 8 feet floor to ceiling in-case you loft your bed) with large spacious closet (not a walk-in tho), and a window above an AC slot (which is optional). This room is the smallest bedroom in the apartment but the most comfortable, temperature wise, of them all. It is the coolest room in the summer and the warmest room in the winter. Rent is $533 per month, including internet, but excluding electricity. We do not have cable. To move in you must have one months rent and one months security deposit, total sum being $1,066.

    About the apartment: Three bedroom, one bathroom, nice sized kitchen with a sky-light, and a spacious living room - dining room combo. The entire apartment is carpeted, except the kitchen and bathroom. The bathroom has a stand-in shower and tub. The apartment is on the 2nd floor of a two family house. The landlord lives on site and they are very consistant, reliable and respectful.

    About the neighborhood: Apartment is located in Bushwick, Brooklyn. The Halsey Street J/Z Stop is 1.5 blocks away (20 minutes travel into the Lower East Side of Manhattan, and 30 minutes travel into Jamaica Queens), and the Halsey Street L Stop is 5 blocks away (25 minutes travel into Union Square, and 15 minutes travel into Canarsie). Broadway Junction is 2 Stations East, providing access to the J/Z , the L, and the A/C trains. Several buses run in walking distance from the apartment. Buses include the B7, B26, B20 and B60. There are 3 supermarkets (Food Bazaar, Pioneer, and Key Food) in walking distance, and 3 laundromats also in walking distance. There are plenty of food spots locally. You will find Fast Food, Dominican, Chinese, Soul Food, Pizza/Italian, and plenty of delis. 

     
     
  3. quirkyblackgirls:

    Trigger Warning: talk of rape, transphobic violence, possible murder

    Pay It No Mind - The Life and Times of Marsha P. Johnson - 

    This feature-length documentary focuses on revolutionary trans-activist, Marsha “Pay it No Mind” Johnson who was a Stonewall instigator, Andy Warhol model, drag queen, sex worker, starving actress, and Saint. With her final interview from 1992, “Pay It” captures the legendary gay/human rights activist as she recounts her life at the forefront of The Stonewall Riots in the 1960s, the creation of S.T.A.R. (Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries) with Sylvia Rivera in the ’70s, and a New York City activist throughout the ’80s and early ’90s. Through her own words, as well as in-depth interviews with gay activist Randy Wicker, former Cockettes performer Agosto Machado, Author Michael Musto, Hot Peaches founder/performer, Jimmy Camicia, and Stonewall Activists Bob Kohler, Danny Garvin, Tommy Lanigan-Schmidt, and Martin Boyce, Marsha’s tale lives on.

    This documentary screened at the IFC theater in New York, and the British Film Institute in London in 2012. You should see it.


    This is incredible and heart wrenching. I wish there had been more Black voices in this. 


     
     
  4. quirkyblackgirls:

    Trigger Warning: talk of rape, transphobic violence, possible murder

    Pay It No Mind - The Life and Times of Marsha P. Johnson - 

    This feature-length documentary focuses on revolutionary trans-activist, Marsha “Pay it No Mind” Johnson who was a Stonewall instigator, Andy Warhol model, drag queen, sex worker, starving actress, and Saint. With her final interview from 1992, “Pay It” captures the legendary gay/human rights activist as she recounts her life at the forefront of The Stonewall Riots in the 1960s, the creation of S.T.A.R. (Street Transvestite Action Revolutionaries) with Sylvia Rivera in the ’70s, and a New York City activist throughout the ’80s and early ’90s. Through her own words, as well as in-depth interviews with gay activist Randy Wicker, former Cockettes performer Agosto Machado, Author Michael Musto, Hot Peaches founder/performer, Jimmy Camicia, and Stonewall Activists Bob Kohler, Danny Garvin, Tommy Lanigan-Schmidt, and Martin Boyce, Marsha’s tale lives on.

    This documentary screened at the IFC theater in New York, and the British Film Institute in London in 2012. You should see it.


    This is incredible and heart wrenching. I wish there had been more Black voices in this. 

    MPJ and SRR are my idols, and always have been! <3 This is beautiful!

     
     
  5. knowhomo:

    Transgender Day of Remembrance

    November 20th, 2012

    Map of Trans* related violence from TransRespect-Transphobia.

    (from TransRespect) The update shows reports of murdered or killed trans people in 29 countries in the last 12 months, with the majority from Brazil (126), Mexico (48), and the USA (15), followed by Venezuela (9), Honduras (8), Colombia (6), Uruguay (6) and Guatemala (5). In Asia most reported cases have been found in India (6), Pakistan (5) and the Philippines (4), and in Europe in Turkey (5).


    List of NAMES/Information of those attacked HERE.


    For more information, visit GLAAD

    (First photo from GLAAD.org)

     
     
  6. greydotmatters:

    From My Paper Bag Colored Heart
    Wilmer Wilson

    2012

    Performance with inflated paper bags. A meditation on skin, objecthood, and liminality, through the historical lens of the paper bag as an implement of colorism. Performed in relation to my sculptural installation titled Domestic Exchange.

    First image taken by myself. Subsequent images by Matt Dunn / courtesy Conner Contemporary Art. 

     
     
  7. come thru folks. :)

    come thru folks. :)

     
     
  8. St. Jacobi Welcomes APOC-NYC Back from the APOCalypse!

    Join us for some celebrating: APOC made it down south safely for the convergence (www.apocconvergence.info), and are bringing some of that love back to all of us in NYC. We’ll be doin it up Nawlins style with some drinkin, dancin and general debauchery.

    8PM - FILM SCREENINGS BEGIN (and continue all night!)
    10PM - PARTY BEGINS

    *$5-50 suggested donation at the door (no one turned away)
    Open Bar for $30+ at the door 
    ($25+ Open Bar with advance Brown Paper Bag ticket purchase, link will be available shortly)

    * Pomegranate Drinks, Beer, Wine, Sangria, Chinese Rice Wine, Vegan baked goods, and other treats

    *DJs Nopales, Leon Grey, and LP will be mixing beats to keep you dancing all night!

    *FILM SCREENINGS ALL NIGHT*
    8PM: Sleep Dealer
    10PM: Afro-punk
    11:15PM: Basta Ya! Sunset Rise up | Sunset Levántate | 够了! 落日出头了!
    12AM: Born In Flames
    2AM: The Spook Who Sat By The Door

    *SILENT AUCTION*
    Hand-made jewelry, 
    Anarcha-Aromatics Handmade Herbal Infusions, 
    Skillshare classes (screenprinting, Shaolin Gong fu & more)
    Collectibles,
    zines, 
    posters, 
    and more!

    All proceeds go to the Recoupalypse fundraising drive to raise $1500 for the APOC convergence and future organizing here in NYC!

    Community accountability for safer spaces in effect! Stay solid and be in touch, and we will respond.

    Check out the APOC table earlier in the day at the Afro-punk Festival:https://www.facebook.com/events/230367163729521/
     
     
  9. mytongueisforked:

    Hey Folks! Lovely Anarchist People of Colour in New York and Montréal need your help! We organized a trip down to New Orleans for the Anarchist People of Colour convergence in July. In order to make this trip accessible to all People of Colour regardless of their…

    Peace Folks, Come thru and support this group I’m a part of.  Party’s gonna be off the hook.

     
     
  10. Cute Facebook Exchange: Afro-Punk Festival Should be a PoC Only Space

    1. ME: I know imma get made hate for this, but whatevs; this event should be PoC only. Just saying.
    2. Offended White Girl 1: I'm white, so I can't come to this? Lol but I love all this music! :/
    3. Some Dude 1: Music has no color
    4. Some Dude 2: Ignorant
    5. Offended White Girl 2: I think this was in response to the previous post by Devin Anahuac Marcia.
    6. ME: it'd just be nice to have a public space like this AFRO_PUNK, amongst only PoC. I don't want to leave the show hearing white folks trying to sing "Bag Lady" by Badu. LOL @ post above this one. The entitlement, LULZ.
    7. White Friend: hi Devin! i actually can feel what you're saying with this, but as something else to float, a lot of the bands have white members.
    8. Me: Hey Ravenna! Without a doubt, There are many bands with black members, and several that are all black. I'm not saying that those bands shouldn't perform either. My statement is not an "end all and be all" statement. It's an opinion. Essentially, what I'm saying is that It'd be nice to have an exclusively PoC space at a music event like AfroPunk, which is deemed alternative/punk/rock music by people of african descent. Although i have my reservations with MichFest (Womens Only Music Fest in Michigan) because it excludes transwomen, I would be hella supportive of a space like that if ALL women were welcome. Spaces like that are utterly badass and are really amazing for folks who may not have spaces like that at their disposal. The root of my argument stems from the desire to have a safe space where PoC can congregate comfortably and safely, free of antagonizing whiteness.
    9. Take for instance the reactions above this post. Should one get offended for an opinion about a desire for a safe-space?
    10. I don't think so.
    11. But privileged folk tend to feel entitled to all spaces, and become annoyed at the mere thought of a space not being readily available and welcoming to them. Its as if all spaces aren't already constructed to be readily available and welcoming to them. Men do this, hetero-normative folks do this, white folks do this. Feel me?
     
     
  11. tzoc-che:

sexrockerbilly:

thepeoplesrecord:

deadliestsnatch:

thepeoplesrecord:

Diana Martinez, 18, an undocumented student, was one of 12 arrested after refusing to leave their sit-in in the Hart Senate Office building.
An estimated 65,000 undocumented students graduate from U.S. high schools each year.

I need to know where these stats are coming from! Anyone?

We got it from here.

If I hadn’t have flown under the radar of white privilege, this would have been me right here. Seriously. I was undocumented.

^^^thank you! this is what people need to see and hear when they try the it’s a legality issue not a racial issue argument.

    tzoc-che:

    sexrockerbilly:

    thepeoplesrecord:

    deadliestsnatch:

    thepeoplesrecord:

    Diana Martinez, 18, an undocumented student, was one of 12 arrested after refusing to leave their sit-in in the Hart Senate Office building.

    An estimated 65,000 undocumented students graduate from U.S. high schools each year.

    I need to know where these stats are coming from! Anyone?

    We got it from here.

    If I hadn’t have flown under the radar of white privilege, this would have been me right here. Seriously. I was undocumented.

    ^^^thank you! this is what people need to see and hear when they try the it’s a legality issue not a racial issue argument.

     
     
  12. FISH FANTASY SAID “WHY YOU SO RACIST?”

    I say, “Racist; Me? …  Have you seen the posts on your tumblr blog? LuLz”  

    I laugh in the face of funny accusations of racism when:

    1. I can’t be racist; I’m not white,

    2. Your blog has some problematic and racist as fuck content, and

    3. You need to shut the fuck up unless you’re committing social suicide deconstructing white supremacy as a white person.

     
     
  13. Geraldo: A Rented Latino

    Geraldo Rivera is seriously a rented LATINO, suggesting the death teenager Trayton Martin was a result of wearing a HOODIe!? Really?

    I personally didn’t care too much about the hoodie march and its passive connotations, but i celebrated people’s awareness of the issue. what infuriates me about the hoodie comment by geraldo is that it has an air of blaming the victim. i hate when people blame victims. blaming the rape victim, slut shaming, people telling queers if you didnt flaunt it people wouldnt pick on you… its the same shit! this comment blames the the victim for his clothing hence taking away the focus from what really happened… a racist ass fuck shot a man of color to stroke his white supremacist power penis… and someone, who is a public figure with a latino identity is only making comments that are empowering white supremacy. I’m livid because of that. Just my two cents.


     
     
  14. lucidstrike:

    lotus-eyes:

    Yuri Kochiyama and Richard Aoki, Japanese members of the Black Panther Party.

    “When I grow up, I wanna be just like Yuri Kochiyama.”

    A bit of information i knew about but finally was provided with all of the facts.  Badass!  Ultimate solidarity!

     
     
  15. Telling a person of color that race doesn’t matter, that they need to see beyond race, that oppression is “colorblind” is oppressive itself.

    tranqualizer:

    As a POC, I refuse to have my experiences erased; a demand to blur the lines of color is a tool to repress a part of my identity.
    Remember, I’m fine with being a person of color - it’s white supremacy that isn’t.

    I had this conversation just yesterday when a white male who is ethnically Latino started making racist stereotypical impersonations of a chinese woman store vendor. He justified he actions by saying everyone does it and we are all equal.  I couldn’t stoop down to his lever because he was 17 and if i whooped his ass, i’d be in jail. But I made sure to do my best and  I ripped him a new one.