zorascreation:

One of the main reasons why I like the idea of seeing a White man is because I have this little healthy kink in my soul that says, “I will whip this White boy into shape if he comes out his face with some off shit. He will respect my Black personhood, whether he likes it or not. He gon’ learn in this relationship.”

In interracial relationships, not many Queer White men respect the personhoods of Queer MoC. I’ll be Goddess-damned if I let any White man reduce me to an uninspiring, racist stereotype about Black male genitalia. He will get got. So the thought of a Queer White man respecting me as a human being in a relationship makes me kinda horny. Ijs. 

this is how i’ve been feeling as of lately while doing the dating thing…  i dont date white men, precisely because of the racism and all that baggage. But there have to be some whiteboys who got they shit together though… RIGHT?  

Relationships are like glass.  Sometimes it’s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.

My relationship came to an end today.  I came to that place in these last two months, where you know you have done more that it is humanly possible to make things work.  Every human has their threshold and my thresholds glass was overflowing with emotional water.  I have learned my lesson. I have my own problems, and although my back was built to carry the weight, I never intended to carry your baggage.  I became a bag lady holding on to more than I needed to carry with me. And as a result I became consumed.  I need my freedom from this hostage situation.  I realized that I love you too much to stay with you.  And the best way to love you right now is to love you enough to let you go.  I love you so much to know that my love isn’t and will not be enough to mend YOU.  I got hurt trying to fix things.

My mom once said “Una persona cambia si quiere”.  You have to want to change; to get better.  I accepted that a long time ago. That is out of my control.  It lies in your hands because you control your destiny. I am in control of mine. I make the choice to gracefully step back.  But I still can’t avoid the obvious. This relationship, in many ways, felt like a complete invalidation of my existence.  You hurt me. I know I hurt you but I always acknowledged my wrongs and made certain to correct them.  You reciprocity was absent or begrudgingly shared. But I have put that to an end. I will not be a victim anymore.  I will not be a victim to your hit and runs.  I did all I could for you, it is now your turn to love you.  May our paths cross again, when we are both more complete.  I wish you well, but above all, I wish you love.  May the love found within you be the love needed to make you whole.  No one else will make you happy if you aren’t whole to begin with.  

I Gracefully Step Back, and Bow.